a scattered guide to Paying for Sex

You can buy it online. I didn't even have to leave my flat. I confidently googled on incognito, and three or four clicks later I was shopping for bodies. It's not amazon so there was no filter for price, lowest to highest. Prices started from £150 for a one hour outcall. “outcall” in layman's terms is when a girl travels to wherever the client wants. An incall is £20 cheaper, but for someone who lacks the social confidence for Subway, I would implode trying to navigate a fucking brothel. This site had a webchat, so could accommodate clients like me who can't handle a phone call.

Incall or outcall? Which girl? What time? Before I had to answer these questions I had to answer society's question how do you morally justify this? Society doesn't give a shit if you wear clothes made in a sweat shop, or carry around a mobile device assembled by a child. Or if you buy a sandwich from a sandwich shop made for you by someone earning 15 times less than Bella, who visited me for one hour. I justified it because I am lonely.

I studied the feminist debate on sex work at university. In an oversimplified nutshell there's 3 viewpoints. 1) The act of buying and selling sex is the embodiment of patriarchal male control over the female body, 2) labour cannot be separated from the person possessing it, so sex work is as oppressive as other wage labour and 3) sex work can be empowering for women if they can have control in their work. I can sympathise with each view.

I once knew an unqualified 19 year old cunt who was given a supervisory role in a British factory, only because his skin was white. His employees would pay to visit a woman in the back of a van who was driven in for their break.

Free choice is exercised to whichever extent individual circumstances allow.

Bella was a graduate who worked part-time in bank. Bella wouldn't have been in my flat if she could do anything she wanted. If I could do anything I wanted I wouldn't have spent 8 hours today selling ancillary products to aviation companies. Life is shit. I felt morally ok paying to be with Bella but incredibly socially uncomfortable.